On top of my personal woes, my mom's health continues to decline and she is eating less and less - to the point that she now weighs just 75 pounds and has no strength. I decided to make a trip to the mainland to visit her and to connect with the rest of my family. I also realized that I needed some positive, fun times to offset all of the sorrow, grief, and loneliness of this summer. The ferry ride was smooth and enjoyable, but things continue to be awkward and difficult as I delivered the first car load of possessions and smaller furniture to Lisa. While I was on the mainland, she stayed at the house packing and taking more things. |
Early in the month, it was great to see the members of "TAG" visiting from Australia after six long years, as they hosted dinner at their Airbnb in Langford. Unfortunately, our second catch up at the Kinsol Trestle was proof that even beautiful, sunny days with fun friends can be filled with heartache and pain... Shortly before I went to meet them, Lisa told me that she no longer intends to ever return to me or our marriage despite acknowledging that I had made the most of each opportunity I was afforded over the past three months to demonstrate growth and empathy. I respected her request for "time and space" and truly believed that we were both gaining better understanding and skills to communicate and support each other more effectively. Clearly we are not on the same page, and I am devastated. After 31 years together, 28 married, life now feels surreal; my dreams literally feel more like reality than my waking hours. I spent one of the two weeks based out of my sister's place, and it was nice to spend some time with her and my nieces. I got to watch both Katrina and Annika's dance classes and coach Katrina a little on some basketball techniques. I visited my mom five times at Langley Lodge. I made a quick three night roadtrip to see friends and cousins, spending one evening getting caught up with Angel(a) in Abbotsford (including dinner at Boston Pizza), one night camping at The Glen at Maple Falls near Mt. Baker with Rob, Shawn, and Sydney (including dinner at North Fork Brewery), and another with Bronwyn's family in Lynden (including dinner at my Auntie Valerie and Uncle Kip's house). It also worked out that Ellis was in town, too! Dad shared his beer & took me out for brunch. I walked Annika to & from school several times and hung out some with Alison, Tara, & Johnny. It was fun watching the Lions win live with friends and my dad. On thelast day of September, I began a four night stay dog sitting Jovey in New Westminster while Karyn dicovered Iceland. Canada won bronze at the FIBA Basketball World Cup, qualifying for the Olympics in the process. I watched three UFC events this month. The to BC Lions assured themselves a home playoff game and the Blue Jays earned a spot as a Wildcard. A new NFL season kicked off and the 49ers are doing well for my fantasy team. I always manage to watch some movies. My sister and I watched some movies, television, and stand-up together. "Lioness" led me down a 'rabbit hole' of special ops spy shows that will definitely carry over into October's viewing with other series. Some of my September television viewing may have been influenced by the company of my nieces. As always, I continued to read - some for entertaining escapism, and some for continued insight and growth. I finally don't cry every single day and had some more reasons to smile.
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